This very hour, one year ago...

I pulled away from my house, my home, my family and everything I knew to start a new. I found my soul again on the road to Chicago and I will always be grateful. I have a tattoo as a tribute to this city and I am very much in love with it.

Happy one year to me, the journey I pursued, and the city that welcomed me.

I'm very blessed and excited to see where I am in another 365 days....

What keeps me going....

Bridge:
With you I can climb the highest mountain
With you I can cross the deepest ocean
With you there's nothing impossible
There's nothing, no nothing,I can't do

Chorus

The way you care, the words you say
The way you share, I'm here today because of you
The way you touch, the things you give
The way you love, That's is why I am, why I live
You pick me up when I was down
Now I smile, used to frown all around
You just keep on lovin' me, lovin' me
Said you must be, really must, must be,
Said you must be from....
--

I cry EVERY TIME I hear this part of the song. The love that I have for God has tripled during this year. I sleep on His shoulder at night and I praise His name in the morning. I am truly grateful for everything He has given me and the only thing I want to do is give back to Him. I will be able to do that with Blueprints.

Have a great day all...xoxo,

Forewarning

Playing on my iPod.....

My thoughts exactly.....

Yey Yo.....

Now that all this analyzing is over I can't wait to get back to my old, cussing, tattooed, sex kitten, don't give two shits self!!!!!!!! Did I tell you I've lost weight? Feeling free AND getting the body back?! I'm bouts to be back BITCHES!!!!!!!

xoxo,
Forewarning

(no subject)

I love this song. No matter what kind of hurt you're overcoming....life is always just a lesson learned.

So......this is what closure really feels like.

This post is going to be rather short. Had a conversation with Atom today and I'm not going to lie....it was one of those moments you try your whole life to avoid. Nobody ever said "Man"ing up and starting fresh was easy but fuck....

I'm used to walking away because you don't have to have those conversations. I was going to keep it light and breezy "Don't worry about it....it's all silly....I'll be fine." Instead I typed my real thoughts in 4 short paragraphs and had to read his responses back.

I've said what he said to me to other men so I'm not butt hurt....you just....you think these thoughts...and when it's confirmed by someone at the rarest moment of honesty, it hurts.

I'll think about it for a few more days but I know I'll be fine....I've overcome worse sorrow then this. At the end of the day, it's just another lesson learned.

What a difference a year makes....

This time last year.....

-my boyfriend of 2 years was in town for his mma fight

-I wanted to move to Chicago but it really wasn't a good time

-we were working on our issues and fears

-we were writing the guest list and setting a date for our wedding

-he talked to my dad about our future plans

-My best friend and I hadn't talked in 8 months and I knew she was pregnant

-I was trying to get over the lose of my own pregnancy

-he would kiss my softly to tell me he loved me

-this time last year I had faith but couldn't hear God's voice

-my boyfriend lost his fight but we went out anyway

-there was a girl who was dancing a little too close to him at the club

-I checked his phone when he was sleep

-I found out he was talking to 3 other girlfriends, had naked pictures and had been hiding a 8 month old daughter

-I dropped him off over his friend's and never looked back

-I felt so betrayed and heartbroken

-I cried for days, never left my closet and didn't show up to work

-depression set in, and I started cutting my wrists

-I finally picked myself up, packed my car, my dog and mapquested directions to Chicago

-I told my mom could help me leave or watch me leave but I couldn't stay in Colorado any more

-I found my soul as I drove the yellow brick road to my OZ......

September 1 st 2010 will mark my first year in Chicago. Chicago saved my life. I know that sounds silly but I was able to redefine myself when I moved here (something I wouldn't have been able to do in CO).

My heart is in Colorado (my family) but my soul (who I am) is in Chicago....