Our version of spaghetti...

Taking shots on my dad's side of the family is like pasta to Italians. It's a big fucking deal. From the moment you turn 21, my dad and uncles were teaching me how to take one.

First...never smell the drink prior to shooting it. Your stomach will automatically get queasy.

Second...breathe in, hold your breath then take the shot....exhale the fumes after (p.s. taking the lime is for pussies (their words not mine). they told me never date a guy til you've seen him take shot. If he can't take a shot, he can't take a punch.)

Third...always drink with family. My family always experiences birthing waves. My dad is the youngest of 7 kids, and I'm the youngest of a 5 year birthing wave that produced 6 cousins. We call ourselves The Cousins. It's super corny til you're around us and realize you dream of being a cousin yourself. We take cousin shots at random times through out the night and if you ain't blood you don't participate. Every time the whole family gets together (Christmas, birthdays, national holidays, BBQs, weddings, births) The Uncles and The Cousins take a shot of Wild Turkey in toast of the eldest brother/uncle that died. Try being a young girl praying to God you didn't spit this up in front of 20 family members. I got good at it in fear I would be shunned from the family.

and Fourth...never drink bottom shelf liquor. If you're too broke to drink either Patron or Crown Royal, your ass is too broke to go out.

Now....friends I've brought around my family tend to think we're alcoholics. No we're not. NO ONE has ever lost jobs, relationships and lives over liquor. Our motto is don't make it a problem, if you aren't around family you aren't drinking. Seriously, taking shots is a way to bridge the gaps between the generations. If you aren't family then you won't understand. My little sister is the oldest of the 2nd birth wave of cousins and she's pissed that she's missing out on drinking with The Cousins. I mean she'll seriously end up going to a shrink when she gets older for separation issues.

Anyway...I'm proud of the fact that I'm a woman who can roll with the big boys and takes shots of Wild Turkey. I used to get many dicks hard with that trick when I was a server...men are so funny by the way. I love my family and the dynamic we have. Outsiders really don't understand and can only take hanging with The Cousins once a year.

I wonder how things are going to change, The Cousins are experiencing our 2nd birthing wave right now. We are expecting 5 babies this year. My ass was drinking water bottles when I went back home, no way was I drinking the tap water.

Did I mention my eldest cousin just open her own upscale liquor store? Yeah....I won't even go into it. I love my family.