Caught in booty shorts...fuck.

Okay so….men find me attractive. In my opinion, there’s A LOT of things I’d wish to change about myself, but judging from the amount of times I get hit on, I can, with confidence, call myself an attractive woman.

Now. There’s a man who lives on my floor who is really attractive…let’s call him Dreads. He’s from the Caribbean so picture Tye Diggs (How Stella Got Her Groove Back) a little taller, honey complexion, neatly done dreads and tattoos. Yum…right!

I’m not attracted to him though.

Why am I not attracted to him?

Cause he’s a straight douche. HE REFUSES TO TALK TO ME….he doesn’t even say hi! I haven’t initiated conversation because I shouldn’t have to! I’m the girl and I’m not trying to come across bold. It’s not even the lack of conversation that makes him a douche. This one time both of us were awkwardly waiting for the elevator IN SILENCE and when the elevator arrived he let me get on by myself and opted to wait for another one because he didn’t want to ride with me! We live on the same floor! Whatevs, he looks like he may have acne scars on his face anyway so I don’t care.

Last night however, I experienced an extremely embarrassing incident involving Dreads. I had just got done washing my hair and need to take my trash out. I threw on the first two things I saw, a sky blue tank top and lime green booty shorts (keep in mind my hair is still slicked back wet)…I looked a hot mess. I did second guess my choice of outfit but I wasn’t walking that far so I went with it.
I remember dragging the trash bags behind me but one got stuck so I ended up going out my door ass first. My last thoughts were please God don’t let anyone see me, especially Douche-bag Magee. Getting ONE step out my door I soon realize there were sounds of footsteps in the hallway. Turning my head, I see that Dreads was so close to me I could see the whites in his eyes.

Okay so remember when I said this man was attractive? I take is back...he is fione! He had on grey sweat bottoms and no shirt (I'm wiping my drool) and then to top everything off he has tattoos...like 6...on his chest, his forearms(my favorite) and his shoulders. In the moment I had an orgasm and panicked at the same time.(I’m so embarrassed right now it’s hard for me to even type cause the next part is awful). I reacted by saying “Oh Fuck!” while running back in my apartment and slamming the door to hide.

(silence)

Really?!....Seriously?!.....Reacting like a 12 year old girl is so far from who I am cause I’m usually calm, cool and collected around men. There are no words left to say and I have no explanation for you. I looked a hot, tranny mess and I’m forever mortified to see Dreads again. FUCK.